I appreciate the opportunity to share with you my Faith Story. This process of writing my most personal and private thoughts concerning my faith would not have been possible before. For most of my church-going life, I have felt that one’s belief in God should be kept both personal and private. For many years, I attended church content with the fact that I “qualified” as a good Christian because of my simple presence. From many of Pastor John’s sermons on this very topic I have learned that I must not be the only Lutheran to think this way. I hope that my words will help someone realize that without faith as your very foundation…your life will never develop into a truly full and happy existence. It has been the most wonderful experience for me personally to finally see how faith makes ALL THINGS POSSIBLE!

I have always tried to accomplish whatever goal that I set for myself basically on my own without much help. Through many trials and errors, I have finally admitted to myself that I am unable to get to where I truly want to be on my own. It is a fact that I have been offered the help I have needed many times through church, family, friends, and colleagues. These are the four main priorities on which I based my life, but not always in this order. Stubborn, bullheaded, and controlling would correctly describe my personality before faith became my main focus.  This seems so elementary to say, but at the same time complex to explain. Some people would say that I should not have any complaints. I NOW would completely disagree.

When Becky and I made the decision to join Holy Cross, it was with great pride that I announced to Pastor John that I believed in God but felt that family came first; then faith, followed by friends and finally career. I had this strong belief that I knew what was best for ALL concerned, but, most importantly- me. I can only thank God that Pastor John did not laugh in my face at my deep misunderstanding of what true Christian faith was all about. I now know that my God knew exactly how hardheaded I was and sent every possible influence to SAVE me from despair.

I am so very fortunate to finally understand that without my faith being at my foundation, true eternal happiness and joy is not possible. Let me be clear on this point because I still have much to accomplish. With this addition of a stronger faith, all aspects of life have improved. This is very exciting but at times almost surreal and somewhat difficult to understand. I still have the same characteristics as before but now I am willing to change for what I feel is the better.

It has become obvious that I held back due to the fact that as in control as I thought I was, in truth I was most afraid of losing control.  I hate to disappoint by saying that I do not really have any deep dark closets to open for you. I can easily admit that I could not see the Light because of how dark the closet was in which I was sitting!  To be accurate I must say that my strong belief in these priorities has produced much joy, but only what a human level can enjoy. You see that because of my imperfect and sinful way of viewing life, true joy as a saved Christian could never, ever be obtained. How could I be so stupid where I prided myself in being so smart? Answer: Lack of Faith…Not so simple for me!

My wife knew long before I did that our long term happiness depended on a faith-based life. I was not in disagreement, but certainly lacked the commitment that she had to joining a church. She tells me that I give her too much credit for this…Maybe so. I am certain that God worked through her to get my attention. I will never forget her prayer in church to soften my heart enough so that I would allow Christ to come in.

Secondly, both of my sons have played significant roles that reinforced her efforts. My father often tried to intervene but without much success. Even friends and co-workers on occasion would try to influence me without any results. No doubt that I have been blessed in many ways, but it took the somewhat normal circumstances of life to finally open my eyes to a higher level of faith.

I have been a member of Holy Cross Lutheran for eight years. During that time I resigned a job that brought us here, stayed unemployed for approximately one year, and for the last four years I have worked back in the same business I left originally. I have been in the same type work for just about as long as I have been married- soon to be twenty-six years. Both my extended and immediate families have enjoyed relatively good health with some serious scares, but without any loss of a loved one. I have lost a couple of friends over the past couple of years that has reinforced how fortunate I have been. This overview of my personal time line appears to be somewhat normal if not lucky. The details that I omitted might not read quite so easily.